As September begins I am already ready for it to be over...at the end of September-beginning of October I will officially be done with my "class" classes. No more endless weekends of sitting in class and wondering when it will end...my program is coming to a close. I will still need to finish my internship, have internship classes and study for my NCE (National Counselors Exam) in April, but I am almost done. The internship is the last big step.
It is so hard for me to believe it is almost over. Once you start kindergarten you spend years upon years of just going to school. It's always the next step, even after my undergrad I knew it wasn't the end, there would be one more, if not two more steps for me to take in schooling. Now it is almost done, now what do I do. It is so scary and exciting at the same time. I have never been so scared to see the small light at the end of the tunnel. This is going to be it, I'll have a Masters degree in COUNSELING!!! I have waited so long to get here and now it is so close.
Yet at the same time I am going to have to make a big decision soon. I can't say what it is yet (I am not pregnant and I am not buying a house and Matt and I are not getting married...yet) but it will be a big decision and could affect a big portion of my life. When it all is able to come out and people see what I am talking about, they may not feel the same, but it really is a big decision. I think talking with my therapist today really helped me through what I am going to do about the situation but it still scares me a little. I am worried of letting people down...and most of all I am worried about letting myself down in the future for making this decision. I don't think it could happen, but I always have to look at the worst scenario to make sense of it all. So stay tuned...when I can say more about this decision I will.
Anyways...I just wanted to share and reflect on the fact that I am so close to being done with my program. I have worked hard for this and it has taken a long time to get here and a lot of self discovery but I have made it. One thing I know for sure is that no matter how scared I am of the internship, final exams and the end result...I am going to do it, because I know it's what I want. It's all going to turn out how it should and I will end up exactly where I am supposed to be.
Monday, August 31, 2009
Prozac...
Well, previously I wrote about getting Apollo some doggy prozac, which we did. We got him a drug called Reconcile that you are to use along with a behavioral program to ease your dogs separation anxiety. He actually was doing really well. The garbage wasn't knocked over everyday and he wasn't eating everything plastic in sight. As the bottle neared the end we had to make a decision: Do we pay another $65 for 30 days of the pills or see how he does without them? Of course we chose see how he does without them. We wanted to see if he had improved on his own or if it really was the drugs....
I came home to find the garbage knocked down and spread through out the house, a salt container that had teeth holes and trails of salt though out the house, a 5th remote eaten, a bottle of deoderant gone and the best part...a butcher knife laying on my floor of our walkway with the rubber handle eaten...needless to say the best decision was to place him back on meds.
Through the recommendation of my friend Michelle we called the vet and asked if there was a cheaper version and he wrote us a prescription for generic adult prozac and we were able to get a 90 day supply for only $10!! So we have put him back on it and are hoping for the best and waiting for it to kick back in. Until then I clean up garbage everyday off my floor....
However, I know that when I look at his cute, adorable face, that he loves me and I love him. If it wasn't for us someone else could have gotten him that didn't have the patience and understanding. They could have given him back only for him to go through numerous homes or even put down...I know it is the extreme thought but almost everyone has told us to give him back, but we won't. We love him and he loves us, that's why he has the anxiety. He is a good boy and he wants to be a better boy, he just needs the time and training to do so.
I came home to find the garbage knocked down and spread through out the house, a salt container that had teeth holes and trails of salt though out the house, a 5th remote eaten, a bottle of deoderant gone and the best part...a butcher knife laying on my floor of our walkway with the rubber handle eaten...needless to say the best decision was to place him back on meds.
Through the recommendation of my friend Michelle we called the vet and asked if there was a cheaper version and he wrote us a prescription for generic adult prozac and we were able to get a 90 day supply for only $10!! So we have put him back on it and are hoping for the best and waiting for it to kick back in. Until then I clean up garbage everyday off my floor....
However, I know that when I look at his cute, adorable face, that he loves me and I love him. If it wasn't for us someone else could have gotten him that didn't have the patience and understanding. They could have given him back only for him to go through numerous homes or even put down...I know it is the extreme thought but almost everyone has told us to give him back, but we won't. We love him and he loves us, that's why he has the anxiety. He is a good boy and he wants to be a better boy, he just needs the time and training to do so.
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