Missing...

I do not miss Wisconsin, I should start with that. I do not miss being in a small little town with the same people doing the same thing. I love being in a bigger city with a beautiful view and beautiful weather all year round (yes we have occasional bad days too but still...), I love having the opportunity to choose from a million and one things to do every day. Whether I do all those things is another story. However, I look at pictures from the past and I miss the memories. I miss having the friends that you thought would always be there for you no matter what, I miss being able to trust people and have a good time not worrying about what they will think the next day because they already know all your stories. It's hard to find the good friends, ones that you can trust all of your stories with. I am struggling with a lot of things in life and everyday I feel like there is no one to talk to about it. Yes I have Matt, and he hears about all of it but he never knows what to say. Yes I have a therapist that is helping immensly on so many levels, but she isn't a "friend." I have a few others that I trust but I don't feel the same closeness with them that I used to feel with the people I grew up with. They all know my stories, my family, my life. They know why I act the way I do...not that it matters now because I am different than I ever was in La Crosse. How do you get those friends back? How do you make new friends with the same qualities? This is why people move back home so fast, it is hard to find out the friends that you thought were your best friends, really aren't. It's also hard to leave those memories and those friends behind never to be found again. I never want to leave Denver, that is not what I am saying. I love it here and I really am the happiest I have ever been and I am also on a new growth journey that is hard but worth it. But in the same token, I wish I didn't have to lose the friends I did, and I wish I could tell them that.